“How To Save A Life” Lyrics & Meaning (The Fray)

The vast majority of popular (and unpopular) music has meaningless lyrics.

They talk frivolous topics in the same way hundreds of other songs have already talked about them.

In other words, they have no depth.

That is not necessarily a bad thing, but it does make you appreciate a song with a meaning so much more.

How To Save A Life by The Fray is one such song.

If features deeply personal lyrics with a positive message.

And fans responded, lifting the song all the way to the top 3 of the Billboard Hot 100.

So what are the lyrics talking about? Keep reading to find out.

 

How To Save A Life Lyrics And Meaning

This song, in which North American band The Fray taught us how to save lives, came out seventeen years ago. The group achieved worldwide fame with it and it hit number 1 on numerous charts. This song is arguably the most important song of their career.

The story behind The Fray’s song How to Save a Life has to do with adolescent drug addiction, depression, death and wanting to die. We gave it a spot on our list of great songs about suicidal thoughts and also on our list of songs about death of a loved one.

Isaac Slade, the author of the lyrics, was inspired by his own experience as a mentor to a 17-year-old: “It’s about all the people who tried to help the boy, but failed… there was no one who could write a manual on how to save him.”

The song also gave title to the debut album of the band. The quartet, formed in Denver in 2002, was then made up of Isaac Slade (vocals, piano), Joe King (guitar and backing vocals), Dave Welsh (guitar), and Ben Wysocki (drums).

The Fray arose when two friends who collaborated in Christian groups in their parishes, Isaac Slade and Joe King, decided to start rehearsing together. They turned towards lyrics with human content and music heavily influenced by piano rock.

The album was released on September 13, 2005 in the United States, and How to Save a Life was the second single, the follow-up to Over My Head. The album enjoyed tremendous success in the USA, where it had already sold millions of copies by the time The Fray landed a big tour in 2007.

Let’s take a look at the lyrics now, before we begin to analyze their meaning.

 

How To Save A Life Lyrics

 

Verse 1

Step one, you say we need to talk
He walks, you say, “Sit down, it’s just a talk”
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came

Chorus

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Verse 2

Let him know that you know best
‘Cause after all, you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you’ve told him all along
And pray to God He hears you
And I pray to God He hears you, and

Chorus

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Verse 3

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you’ve followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he’ll say he’s just not the same
And you’ll begin to wonder why you came

Chorus

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Refrain

How to save a life
How to save a life

Chorus

Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Outro

How to save a life
How to save a life

 

How To Save A Life Meaning

Schoolmates and founders of The Fray, Isaac Slade and Joe King, are responsible for composing most of the group’s repertoire.

In an interview with USA Today, Isaac Slade explained that he wrote this song based on a first-person experience when he was a mentor at a camp for troubled youth:

“One of the guys I worked with was a musician. Here I was, a protected suburbanite, and he was just 17 and had all these problems. And no one could write a manual on how to save him.”

In another interview, Isaac Slade explained in detail his inspiration for writing the lyrics to How to Save a Life. He says he and Joe King were asked by a friend to come help out at a group home called Shelterwood in Denver.

The friend was the president of the organization, which takes in troubled teens whose parents are not able to handle them.

Isaac says there was one boy i particular who had an amazing story. He had made a lot of bad decisions resulting in lost relationships and that made him think about his own life and some of the relationships he had damaged in a similar way,

This experience left a lasting impact on the singer and he wrote the song How to Save a Life about all the people who tried to help the boy, but failed.

For example, the boy’s family and friends approached him and told him he needed to stop using drugs or they would never speak to him again. Of course, that did not work.

What the boy needed help. He was suffering from a deep depression and was losing friends as a result. He also lost his best friend and just didn’t know how to cope with that.

Isaac goes on to explain that the lyrics of the song describe “an adult’s attempt to deal with a teenager’s problems.” In the chorus, the singer of The Fray laments that he himself was unable to save a friend because he didn’t know how.

Basically, the lyrics of How To Save A Life tell us about the moment in a friendship when two people face each other to bring to light the problems they have, and propose solutions to save the life of that relationship that is so important for both.

Whatever the outcome, the consequences will be monumental. You learn how strong all the good you have experienced together actually is. Is it stronger than pride, or does pride win out in the end?

If pride wins, the relationship ends and you are left wondering what the point of it all was. If you are able to overcome that pride, the relationship emerges much stronger and healthier.

The music starts with soft piano notes that support the singer’s voice, giving way to bass and drums, and then to the guitar raising the music. In the video, words and phrases are superimposed and the band proposes 99 steps to save a life.

Although this was the initial goal of the song, the band expanded its meaning to other possible interpretations. To do this, they created a website and encouraged their followers to make videos on the subject and express their own feelings.

The idea came from the many responses to the song:

“I got a lot of e-mails about it (…) One boy died in a car accident, and I guess it had been the last song he downloaded from his computer. They played it at his funeral, and some of his friends got ‘Save a Life’ tattooed on their arms. The response has been overwhelming,” said Slade.

Nearly a year after the song’s initial US release in February 2007, Slade stated, “I’m still getting an incredible number of emails about this song. We have friends who think it’s great not to have to think because they’re drunk or drugged. But there is a better way to be happy.”

The Fray’s guitarist, David Welsh, told the story of How to Save a Life on I Like Music:

“The song came about very organically. Isaac had the idea of ​​this kind of ‘lullaby’ playing the piano. Later, he prepared this repetitive drum beat with Ben (Wysocki). The lyrics were born from an experience that Isaac had with a teenager who was struggling to overcome his addictions. It was a very natural process, the song was growing up and the lyrics fit really well.”

 

How To Save A Life Lyrics Meaning: Final Thoughts

How To Save A Life is one of The Fray’s biggest hits. And the deeply meaningful lyrics area big part of that success. Perhaps the biggest part.

Many songs have become hits with boring, meaningless, and sometimes even moronic (looking at you Tubthumping, Barbie Girl, Who Let The Dogs Out, and many, many more), lyrics, but this song shows that intelligent lyrics do make a big difference. They can touch people’s lives and turn a song into a hit.

Check out our analysis of the lyrics for House of the Rising Sun by The Animals (and many others) for another hit song that deals with a young man who went down the wrong path and needed saving. It also happens to be one of the greatest songs you’ll ever hear.

Did you know the Beatles wrote a song commissioned by Timothy Leary, a man many say could have used some intervention? Check out our analysis of the insane Come Together lyrics meaning for more.

Finally, a song by a singer who could have used some intervention. Scott Weiland of the Stone Temple Pilots died of an overdose. Check out our analysis of the meaning of the lyrics to Plush, arguably STP’s signature song.

Photo Credit

Title photo by Jazzfestsiouxfalls: Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0